Ooof I just want to type out two feet and squash what is below here. It is pretty bad and unfinished. Onwards! I am not ready for this.
It is the 30th and I have to do a piece a month or some shit goal i set myself. I am working tomorrow and it is 2 am. I'm going to finish this one with without going backwards a sentence. No editing. I am tired. The stuff in itallics and  brackets is the stuff I already wrote and planned to do this month. But I feel so busy. You know, I made myself cry over my own story this week. That's the first time that has happened in such a way. Crazy. I was smoking this vaporizer filled with banana flavoured smoke and I read one of my pieces and got really teary and weird and then whatever, I wish I could go backwards and delete all this. Anyway, erratic, yes. But this one is about my belly button. It is going to be two parts. It is the last day before I can submit to myself and my editor self will shout at me for more spiderman pics but whatever.
[I have been writing great deal lately. So I am going to do a personal multimedia piece. I think I said it would be a Christmas thing but whatever, who cares. What holiday is close.... 3rd October, German Unification Day. Solid. This entry is dedicated to that.
whatever I'll just start.
- The Egg Party]
by The Egg Party
[Opalsnakes, a colleague of mine, had started tattooing. It had happened before to me once, when all us staff chipped in for a gun for Bones. This second time I decided I wanted to volunteer while he was learning and he set me the task of deciding what I wanted. Well he was tattooing windows at the time. Real scenic, beautiful vistas. So I figured I would get one.
Right, first step. What would the view out of the window? What would the background be? I thought about rolling plains, nature, a tree, no... wait a house! So I picked a house but what kind of house? Okay, I think of Dorothy's house, done. But the tornado needs to be spinning and it is just missing. So I imagine the house being sucked up by weather, boards being ripped, the construction sorta... disconstructed. What if the tornado was a black hole? Perfect. I have the clam natural scene of a house on a bluff being sucked toward the event horizon.
What if the blackhole was around my bellybutton and then the house was being sucked inside me. I have a particularly deep belly button so that works. I walk over to have coffee with Opalsnakes to discuss and I remembered the guy loved stargate. Okay what if there is a stargate instead of a house on this hill and instead of the blackhole, there is the aquatic blue wormole of a Stargate. Surrounded by a window. So I decide on the walk over there that is what I will do. Opalsnakes tells me, sure, it's going to take a while to design. he asks me if how bout we just stick to the Stargate around the bellybutton, leave the window for now. One portal is enough. I said for him to make it so.
He got drawing.
I trusted him.
I still trust that Dirty Canadian Dawg.
Now Opalsnakes wasn't taking money at the time, said he was learning. I agreed but I started designing shit of my own. I sent him a letter. I asked my Stoney what post was in German and he said "Post," pronouncing the capital P. So I pressed the buzzer and said, as the character of postman delivering post, Post." He buzzed and dropped this in his box.]
[Opalsnakes had been to the US a few times and was concerned about the logo of the US Air Force that I chose. He imagined fines and long lost crimes. He missed the Stargate Command but soon realised it wasn't a penalty, perhaps the opposite. He was being offered a job.]
[Included in the following repeated message was my payment in advance:]
19 Heisser Ct.
Farmingdale NY 11735
9 February 2018
Berlin Germany [Redacted]
Thank you for your tremendous effort you contributed to the Stargate program, in the planning and construction phases of the new gate design. It will usher in a new era of discovery that you will only partially know; confidentiality is an unfortunate consequence of this important work.
I, for one, am excited about the possibilities this new technology as I will be in charge of the first few missions. Back into the belly of the beast, so to speak.
Thank you again for your thoughtfulness. Please accept this cash bonus as a token of my sincere esteem for your work.
Brigadeer General Jack O'Neill
United States Air Force]
[So he appreciated it, money meant it was easier to spend time on the design. He sketched and measure the stencil. Here is the original design.]
[The text reads the position where my button will form once the gate is functional. They chevron numbers are right.]
So this is what was written so far. My w key is broken and so i have to hit it extra hard to write the words write and word and wednesday and all those. Anyway here I go. This is the point in which I described the thought process for getting a tattoo. Maybe I'll finish this story. Probably gunnna take a while. I think it is an exploration of what strange is, where it fits into the whole spectrum of mental health.
What is strange?
I mean you're not sick. Society encourages it. But is this strange? Is this tattoo chocie forced and then less strange? I dunno. If being strange is not mentally based, in that it does not grow as a malfunction of the brain, it is something else, it is not malfunction, it is function. So it is a function that occurs sometimes, probably all the time, to different degrees. Ahh, what was I taking about? Okay, yes, strange is more a choice, it is sort of like choosing to be a little bit sick, or simulating it, becuase you suffer the consequences. Because you know you have to talk about it and be confident about it but I mean, it is stressful, do you bring that on yourself? Is the attention your fault? Is there fault to attention? I mean, sometimes I want that, so we all look on the ground and stuff.
I dunno. I'm pretty drunk and this is all I can handle writing because this is the last moment I can submit something before work tomorrow and stuff. I mean, I'm alright. This alll sounds probably... pretty weird or annoying or like a high pitched fart or something. But anyway, fuck this I did it. Month done.